The No Future Rule

1. Tiny Little Embers 2. Avoidance Tactics 3. Dead in a Ditch 4. Downright Filthy 5. What Happens in the Shower Stays in the Shower 6. The Middle of a Pissing Contest 7. We Weren’t Dry Humping 8. Green Beans and Lies 9. A Neighborly Cockblocking 10. Sweating with the Oldies 11. Panicking Never Helps 12. Welcome to the Danger Zone 13. Bed Buddies 14. Snack Cake Heists and Bad Apples 15. Satan in a Suit 16. A Pair of Thank-Yous 17. Pillow Talk 18. Eggs Benedict for Assholes 19. Khaki Is Not Her Color 20. Carpool Confessions 21. Fan, Meet Shit 22. Soccer Game Showdown 23. Team Lina 24. Pecan Pie Punch and Pointy Elbows 25. Speeding Ticket 26. Nash Who? 27. Snakes and Shakes 28. Shark Week Crappy Hour 29. Winning Career Day 30. Surveillance with a Side of Drama 31. Would You Like Onion Rings with That? 32. A Courtesy Warning 34. Inevitable 35. Pushed Too Far 36. High Fives and Orgasms 37. A Hole in the Wall 38. First Date 39. The Gang’s All Here 40. Smile Pretty for the Camera 41. Words of Wisdom 42. Chocolate Chocolate Chonk 43. Bad Day, Bad Advice 44. Eye Water 45. A Perfectly Good Parachute 46. Blame the Candy Penises 47. Pantsless and Ass Up 48. They Kidnapped the Wrong Girl 49. A Score to Settle 50. Brecklin Is the Worst 51. When Did You Stab Him with a Pitchfork? Epilogue Author’s Note to the Reader